My wife has all the pictures on her computer. All I have is a salad.

Ok. Its been over a year since my last post. What can I say? Life is busy, and I am lazy!  But time to slowly dip my toes into the waters of the blogosphere and acclimate myself to the surrounding temperature.
Looking through the pictures on my computer I quickly realized that my wife, Katie, has all the family pictures.  So today I'm going to blog about a salad.  Because I like salad.

Growing up, a side salad was a typical staple for our evening meal.  We called it supper.  Now I call it dinner, because when you get married your vocabulary changes. Sometimes dramatically.  But nevertheless a small salad accompanied the main event.  Trying to recollect my early childhood, which used to be alot easier when I was closer to it, our side salads were pretty legit. Iceberg lettuce, carrot, tomato, chopped hard boiled egg, and a sweet pickled cherry pepper.  I loved the cherry pepper.  Actually, I loved the brine in which the cherry pepper was pickled.  I would bite a small hole in the cherry pepper and extract all the juice with extreme prejudice.  Then my dad would eat it so it wouldn't go to waste, an attribute he has passed on to me.

I dont think it was until I was in high school that we started using Romaine lettuce.  To be honest, I don't think I knew there were lettuces other than iceberg.  You can imagine how amazed I was.  I had been sheltered for so long from the immense plethora of greenery on which a salad could be built.  An unusual but not so unusual feeling. The kind of feeling you get if you lived in a log cabin and never went outside.  Then one day you ventured outside and you were surrounded by skyscrapers.  And the passers-by stared in awe as their ideas about how much plaid one person could possibly wear were shattered.

 My parents did their best to shelter me from the evils lurking in this world.  Romaine lettuce, baby spinach, and spring mix were apparently made of adultery, swear words, and Democrats.  Perhaps they were waiting until I was old enough to cope with such a paradigm shift.  Its a process that takes years.  My eyes will still roll back in my head if someone puts a bowl of arugula in front of me. But I digress.

The dressing that accompanied our salads was somewhat of a rudimentary Thousand Island, but it was sooooooo good. And still is.  Its goodness is imbedded in its simplicity.  Built upon the cornerstones of the greatest of American ingredients.  Mayonnaise and ketchup. Salt, black pepper, and garlic salt to taste.  As I've grown into somewhat of a mature adult, I have developed a more refined palate.  Now I make it with freshly ground black pepper.  And Kosher salt. And I use Hellman's instead of Kraft.  What can I say.  I'm a carnisuer.

So when Romaine was introduced to our table, it didn't take long for our side salads to become a little more filling.  Chopped celery and bell pepper had joined the party along with cucumber and green onion.  The evolution was pretty dramatic.  Like watching Richard Simmons transform into Arnold Schwarzenegger.  Ok, I'll admit. That comparison is not the most appetizing but whatever.

Here is the photo that inspired this post.  I took this picture after making this salad so I could show my mom, because this was an awesome salad.  After I emailed it to her I realized that she cant eat salads like this anymore because they contain too much sodium.  I felt pretty bad about that.  Sorry, mom.   Then I ate the salad and didn't feel as bad.  Actually, I felt awesome because this salad was incredible. Two eggs are on that sucker!

Well, thats all I've got for now. Until next time.